Even though I brought patches and nicotine gums, I never tried it out because I was had been at the Divine retreat center. I guess because I was in the business of praying and listening to speeches, I never really felt the urge to smoke. But since then, every day was a constant struggle. To give in or not to give in…. Just one more and I will never have another drag. A mantra I had been following religiously for the last 25 years.
25 years, can you imagine that… I had been lying to myself that I would quit after one more cigarette. What a scam and what a shame.!!! Because of my stay at the the retreat I finally got a head start this time. At last I was able to tell myself, if I could do it for 5 days, I can do it for one more day and that kept me going. The temptation was irresistible, but thankfully, there was no temptation at work. Its a smoke free zone, by that, I don’t mean that there is a rule against smoking, its just that the place is filled with new age health conscious kids. I was the only dinosaur working there with a bad boy image.
After 11 days , I beginning to feel that the demon is slowly but surely loosing the battle and I am getting a firm footing on the upper ground. 57 more days to freedom!!!!