Be careful what you pray for

I had an infirmity that severely restrained a normal relationship with my family, friends, colleagues at work and of all with GOD. I had fought it long and hard, but I could never conquer it, In fact the more I tried, it strangled me even stronger. As I was left gasping for air, I reached out to the community. Well meaning folks recommended different things and I followed through with it. But it always came back, not just back, it came back with a vengeance.

one day I realized that I was a cripple, I mean literally… I couldn’t go to a shop and buy grocery, I couldn’t ride on a train,  I wasn’t even allowed to sleep in a public place or in my car. Some how , I would find myself in places where I would least expect myself to be.

So I prayed one day, with great grief and tears in my eyes and asked GOD to take it away  from me. It didn’t matter  what the cost was, I just wanted to break free from this malady. I would rather have a relationship with my maker than have anything or anybody in my life. As it turned  out, I found myself making some very controversial decisions (much against the dismay of my benefactors)

But thanks  be to GOD, I am a free man and I am not a cripple anymore, for he has set me free. My family is no more with me and I am drifting through life alone , with my eyes focused on him and I am ready to die today, so that I can meet my maker and revel in his love.

I do miss my family, esp. my children Aaron and Anaiah (greatly), but I know that GOD has a much better plan and that he would be a far better father to them.

Psalm 68:5-6New International Version (NIV)

5 A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
    is God in his holy dwelling.
6 God sets the lonely in families,[a]
    he leads out the prisoners with singing;
    but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.

Psalm 82:3 (NIV)

3 Defend the weak and the fatherless; 
uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.

I may not ever meet my children again (ever), But I have the assurance that I will meet them in heaven.

Proverbs 3:5-6 
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; 
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.