The day after


Christmas used to be fun when when I was young, but as I grew older, it has lost its magic and allure. For the last couple of years it has been anything but remarkable. One cannot enjoy Christmas with out being surrounded by people, children, family, gifts & fire works.

This Christmas it was just me and my mom taking turns staring at empty walls. I was hoping that I would receive some pics of my kids as a Christmas present, but that was not to be. Never mind the gifts I brought for them without even having a proper address to send to. I eventually got the address of the church that they attend.

I do not know how bachelors survive into their old age. I find it boring and depressing. So I am really not enjoying this phase of my life…. especially because my children are reaching out towards the cusp of adulthood.

Anyway Christmas is overpriced and oversold.  No one enjoys Christmas more that retailers and profiteers.

hil_robin_williams_about

 

 

 

 

41 thoughts on “The day after”

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  1. I’m sorry that your Christmas is so blue. I hope the remaining days of Christmas bring you some sort of joy. Of course the tradition of Christmas in the Church is not all ribbons and bows. Today, for example, is St. Stephen’s Day, remembering the first martyr in the book of Acts. The Lord knows our dark times as well as our celebrations, and he is present in the darkness too. God bless you. J.

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  2. I find it’s the disruption in my routine that gets to me. I thrive in working through each day slow and steady. This time of year, I have to keep reminding myself to be patient and grateful – that everything doesn’t come true all at once. But, I do have to say, family time is precious – our children and nephew/nieces are 19-26, so it’s exciting to see them taking flight (at the same time as being saddening to see them leave). But we do have two babes in the next generation – we get to help out increasingly with them.
    Blessing to you, hang in there!

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  3. I pray for you. I think I understand what you are saying. You know what Christmas is about. You know that it is about when Jesus came, the purpose of His coming. Let us rejoice in that when we can see nothing else. That is the best thing; if not the only thing.

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  4. So sorry to hear that you’re spending the holiday alone, wondering where the family is. I’ve gone through that myself and know how lonely it can be.

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  6. I’m so sorry things are rough. I have recently lost another part of family by their choices to believe things they’ve made up about me in their minds because they were upset with my walking away from a relationship with my father to stop the abuse. It is very painful. But for God, people will never be enough. It’s especially hard when it’s family doing the hurting and not caring.

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  8. It broke my heart to read this, but at the same time am happy that you can sincerely express this, yes that is wonderful. It is a sign of hope that you can communicate how you feel. The mind is a wonderful gift from God, and so it is that you can talk about these circumstances. When the Spirit comes and talks to us it is the mind that He first talks to. Often it is the brain which, due to His communications begins to deliver us from such states as the one you describe. “Faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.” We grow in His Knowledge in this way and Joy and Happiness is learned. The mind it is which we normally employ in getting us out of scrapes, mischief, etc..
    And so it is His Word which whispers to us as if we were relying on our own interpretations of states, life, love, warmth etc.. And so things change. Christmas the way the world celebrates it, I have no need for. But lovingly I am able to show His Love, different from mine, to those who wish, have a need to celebrate in that frame (Humanistic). I have fun with them if they come near for I am a vessel, but a instrument to let Him display His compassion.
    Go in this manner if you are able and watch things change, watch those around you rejoice due to you, His presence in your heart. Though you will really not miss romance, you can take it or leave it, but with Him flourishing in you heart, it might come and then you can put it into perspective so that you will not be hurt by it.
    Sincerely; MAO (love for you and yours)

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      1. I am thrilled. Thank God and your willingness. A heart disposed. I’m so happy for you and your loved ones. Carry on dear lady. And if I can be of encouragement, view the end of my post for contact info or my Gravatar.

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  9. Reblogged this on andnowmiguel and commented:

    I would much appreciate if you can comment something of joy and love to this person and family who is going through a difficult time. She is appreciative of good responds, won’t bite. At this time of year good will is much enjoyed, so do your share please.

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      1. Your honesty, your willingness to speak your heart, merits that the voice you possess be spread, shared, for there are others going through what you go through. And there are souls out there who have experienced light of a different sensibility who have something to convey to your heart. I’m glad that you have hope. You will be blessed, I know. More light will step forth. You will be empowered. I am indebted to you, this being the opposite of your thoughts, life is like this, remarkable. God is on His Throne. And as to your thanks, you are so wonderfully welcome.

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      2. I am resolute that I wont scream at GOD for the injustice that has been dealt to me. But then when I think deeper, everything that I have to suffer for is a direct consequence of my sinful life. Either way, like Jesus said, my circumstance will have no power over me unless it was allowed by GOD. So I am not angry at anyone and I hold no one responsible for my plight. I hope though that I can trade it all for a day in heaven

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      3. You can have more than a day in Heaven if you have gone before God and asked Him to take your life as a offering, given Him you, trusted in the Sacrifice of Christ, the supreme offering that He might come and reside within you, that your perspective be enhanced, empowered for your sake and the sake of those about you.
        None of the aforesaid is meant as a criticism. You must trust me on this.
        I say it because I wish to transfer on to you the best which I possess. That is my motive.
        His Life is the only good thing I know.
        It is not the circumstances which define us but instead the regeneration within afforded by His Son’s sacrifice upon the Cross of Calvary. Why? Why is this referred to?
        Because when we trust in that work about which Christ Himself said “It is finishded.” All that was needed to bring us back into the family of God was accomplished at the Cross. His Spirit was poured out for us, Hell, the curse, the debt we owed the Father in Adam was fulfilled. There is no condemnation to those who are in Christ, accounted in Christ. Joining a family, the Family. Back in the fold.
        All the things in this life are but substitutes. True joy can only be known, recognized once we “Come back to the fold.” Indeed. It is a Spiritual matter, possessing the Life of Christ through Faith, recourse. Yes.
        You did sound on the verge (the post; Day After) of brokenness, or experiencing it. There is nothing wrong with you when it comes to criticism. I am no different from you. No one is any better than you.
        Our circumstances are designed to strip us of illusions. True I don’t know what your experiential events have been, but I know that we are here upon the great stage; “life” which is not True Life for we lost that in Adam our first Father. So I address those circumstances which are not evident, instead we react to the trappings of this life and how they strip us of sight.
        I will end this here. Thank you for your communication. I am here at your service. Mande (Spanish, which signifies command me), a beautiful response I got when managing a restaurant in Manhattan in my youth, ever I should call this worker, he would respond with “Mande” (mhan dheh). Bye. You will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.

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      5. I am honored, very generous. I myself am unable to do that, don’t know much about stuff like that, don’t understand what a widget is (a great deal of things). So have had to go on in spite of the lack of knowledge on how to do things like that. In fact when I see stuff like that some times I think that I don’t even possess the ability, because I have a free blog. I focus on writing (and that with grammatical lack) due to my lack of internet know how. And listen like that song “People”, we all need help, attention from one another, that’s what we should be doing, but thanks for the “kindness….” statement.

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  10. I can relate to your sadness. For years, I was lonely whether or not I was alone. One year I spent Mother’s Day alone. My ex took my daughter to see his mom, ended up fighting with his mom and turned around. My daughter was dragged here and there. After we were apart, I was alienated from my daughter for 5 years, saw her once. I prayed for her and cried myself to sleep. God is merciful to me that I was reunited with my daughter almost 10 years ago, and slowly rebuild the relationship. Sorry about your children ignored you. It’s so hard when they do it on their own will with whatever influence that took them through this path. Pray for your mom’s health. Hope that when you come back to US, you can enjoy your family!! Just to do that you’re never alone, with God by your side, and with His messenger – the angel’s protection!

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