We Made a Decision


So I said, “What shall I do, Lord?” And the Lord said to me, “Arise and go….”
Acts 22:10

In his autobiography, Our Incredible Journey, Word of Life co-founder Harry Bollback and his wife, Millie, wrote about their years of missionary service in Brazil, where they lived in very primitive circumstances. “Living under these conditions was truly difficult,” Harry wrote. “But neither of us thought of it as being hard at the time. We had made a decision to serve the Lord, and we were just doing what we thought the Lord would have us do. We were enjoying the good hand of God’s blessings.”

In Acts 22, the apostle Paul recounted his conversion for the Jewish Ruling Counsel. He told them of the light that blinded him on the Damascus Road, and he recounted the two questions he asked God: “Who are You, Lord?” (verse 8) and “What shall I do, Lord?” (verse 10)

When we come to Christ for salvation, we then ask, “What do You want me to do?” We just need to have a submissive spirit to His guidance, and He’ll use us in ways beyond our expectation.

I’m convinced that when you are serving the Lord, there is never a question of sacrifice. It’s just doing what we are supposed to be doing for His glory. You don’t think of the sacrifice—you think of your mission.
Harry Bollback

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Redeemed


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I am impressed in debt
I cant seem to wring free
these bonds that tie me up,
are tightening its grip on me
my nakedness reveal my shame
my inner man is but a shadow in retreat
Each day brings forth neglect and compulsions
I cant seem to idle away a day in sublime peace
When will this torture end
when will my contenance shine
My faith is on a precipice
but I cant loose hope
I can ignore the world
ignore the reality of death
but I cant ignore the claims of a mad man
for he was either mad, bad or the son of God
No man has made such claims.
no man so bold
None died for a treacherous lie
none personified such foresight
I know my path is set
I know my resolve will be tested
but the captain of my ship
his sights are keen
He holds my hand
no condemnation, but grace
his promises are everlasting
and I await his return.

Written by: Prashant Thomas

The Bitch & The Lord


A couple of years back, there was a pastor who used to counsel me. We used to meet at around 6ish in the morning. He was a great guy and I really admired his willingness to go the extra mile. One day as we were parting after our morning meeting, he called me and I turned back and looked at him. He smiled and said “You know you are a bitch right!!!”. I was a bit shocked, but then I realized he was just trying to wake me up from the maladies (or slumber) that I was suffering from. I am a servant of GOD…. because I know that I am saved.

Romans 8:1

1Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

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Forgiveness is a very difficult concept to understand.

Where have I been
these years of yearning.
My life riddled with the benign
caricature of a vagrant being.

You called me by name
You knew me from before time,
But I recognized the shame
of a life untamed

Bankrupt and insolvent,
my soul wreaked by an ailment
Emancipated and outed as a miscreant,
My sacrilege, aberrant and errant.

Hands that wrote away the onlookers
Men with stones to mark the hooker
Forgiveness in the hands of the maker
Tenderness and compassion, devine in nature

How oft can you find such love
How oft can you deserve such kindness
My LORD and my GOD
I will never perceive or
comprehend the nature of

HIM WHO IS, WHO WAS & EVER WILL BE

Written by : Prashant Thomas

The demons are coming back


Not even a   day after the retreat, I feel like 10 more demons are trying to find a place inside me. When ever you are institutionalized (by that I mean retreats as well), you think you have overcome your demons and have swept your house clean. But it has never worked for me…. I seem to do well for a while  and then I fizzle out for no good reason.

The common notion is that you need 21 days of abstinence (or persistence) to break/create a habit, but apparently there is a great difference between forming a habit and automaticity (i.e. the notion of acting without thinking). Apparently automaticity is the central driver of habits.  There is a curved relationship between habit and automaticity — meaning that the earlier repetitions were most beneficial for establishing a habit, and gains gradually dwindled over time.

It’s like trying to run up a hill that starts out steep and gradually levels off. At the start you’re making great progress upwards, but the closer you get to the peak, the smaller the gains in altitude with each step.

Research suggests that 21 days to form a habit is probably right, as long as all you want to do is drink a glass of water after breakfast. Anything harder is likely to take longer to become a really strong habit, and, in the case of some activities, much longer.

If  anyone ever reads this piece, please make a short prayer for me. I really need all the help I can get

Partial sources : brainpickings.org

A moment in time


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I am alone
but Am I alone?
A chasm seperating my being
of goat heads and a lamb slain

betwixt knowledge and wisdom
betwixt the world and the Word
caught in the intrepid dance
between being teased and wanting to please

my life runs amok
and my blood curdles
because I am so lost
in the indecision to decide

Have at me I pray
for a moment it ceases
but the waves swell
and the lions roar

for I wish to remain
at the feet that’s nailed
For there is more to a  moment of grace & joy
than all that the world has to offer for a million years

Written By: Prashant Thomas